


To Work Inside

by withhishands



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: M/M, post-episode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-06
Updated: 2013-03-06
Packaged: 2017-12-04 10:52:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/709953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/withhishands/pseuds/withhishands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ian wants the world from Mickey, but Mickey can't give him anything else. He's already given him everything. Absolutely everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Work Inside

**Author's Note:**

> Title from 'A Song for You' originally by Gram Parsons.  
>  _Some of my friends don't know who they belong to._  
>  _Some can't get a single thing to work inside._
> 
> I, like all of us, am trying to cope with last week's episode. This is my attempt. I put the warning on it even though I don't touch on the actual _occurrence_. I just wanted to be safe. I gave it an M rating because I don't know how to rate things.

Mickey can't look at Ian while Ian's looking at him. The last time he did that, it did not end well for Mickey. How many times does Ian need to rip his heart out before he just leaves? He's going to eventually. What good is Mickey right now? He's bruised and broken and bleeding everywhere. Ian's disappointment and disgust is too much to handle. Mickey doesn't need shit like that right now from Ian, especially from Ian. 

He doesn't look at Ian because he can't. He doesn't want to. And he's straight now anyway. As far as anyone other than himself is concerned, he's straight. It was dumb to think he could get away with anything else. 

Ian wants the world from Mickey, but Mickey can't give him anything else. He's already given him everything. Absolutely everything.

When Ian says _pistol-whipped_ exactly like Mandy did before she laughed at him, Mickey's gut twists. Mickey knows Mandy doesn't know better. She only sees what Mickey lets her see, and that's someone who could definitely do with a smack. Hearing it come from Ian's mouth is different, though. 

Mickey shoots until he's out of cartridges. He slides down onto the floor and stares blankly at the sky. His dad's going to expect him home before sunset. It's not a rule, but two days ago he got a swift kick in the stomach for staying out too late. Dad doesn't want him falling back into his faggy ways. 

He doesn't see Ian for a few days, but he does see him for four days straight after that. He shows up, watches Mickey shoot, says goodbye, and leaves. Mickey changes where he is everyday, but Ian always finds him. 

"You're a tough guy to find," Ian says, breaking the silence that usually surrounds these meetings. 

"And yet you keep trying," Mickey says. Talking feels strange. Talking to Ian feels strange. He doesn't think Ian's going to leave so soon this time, though, so Mickey's going to have to say something to get him to leave. 

"I won't stop trying," Ian says. He doesn't say it softly or quietly. He says it in his normal, fucked up voice. And Mickey appreciates that, how loud his voice is, like it's not going anywhere. 

"Do you have any fuckin' clue what's gonna happen if my dad sees you hangin' round me?"

Ian stays quiet and it's worse than him talking. Mickey's own mind races. He's answered that question a hundred times over. He can answer it in his sleep. His dad's going to kill him. Maybe not Ian, but definitely Mickey. He doesn't know what'll happen to Ian. Hopefully his dad's smart enough to leave Ian alone. Even with Mickey dead, Ian's spoken for. Ian's got so people that care about him, it makes Mickey's head spin. Mickey only has Ian. That's the full list of people who care about him. 

"Just fuckin' get outta here," Mickey says, motioning with the gun, still not meeting Ian's eyes. 

When Ian doesn't say anything, doesn't make a move, Mickey forces as much anger as he can onto his face and looks at Ian. But he can't keep it up. Ian's face looks broken, but not like Mickey's looks broken. He's wearing his heart on his sleeve and it makes Mickey pause. Mickey blinks a few times and curses at himself. 

"Shit," he mumbles quietly. He drops the gun on the ground. 

"Jesus," Ian says sharply, jumping momentarily. "You can't just drop a loaded gun on the ground. Shit."

Mickey chokes out a laugh at his fucking boyscout. Ian squints his eyebrows together briefly, confused by Mickey's laughter. Jesus, what Mickey wouldn't give for Ian to laugh with him. Mickey bites his lip, takes a deep breath, and goes for it.

He closes the space between them effectively. Ian flinches, which makes Mickey laugh again. Mickey kisses him, though. Ian thinks he's going to get punched, but Mickey honestly just wants to kiss him. 

It's not short and chaste like the first kiss Mickey gave Ian. This is rough, almost brutal, because it's the only way Mickey can right now. Ian gives just as much as Mickey, his teeth sharp and his hands bruising. He pulls Mickey close, as close as he can manage, and doesn't let go. His hands grip Mickey's back tightly. 

Mickey pulls back after too long without a breath. Ian takes a deep breath with him, keeping his forehead against Mickey's. Ian's greedy, though, and presses his lips back to Mickey's before he's caught his breath, like he can't help it. Mickey smiles and shakes his head, stepping away. 

Ian coughs and wipes his mouth on the back of his hand. A grin stretches slowly across Ian's face. The kind of grin that makes Mickey's stomach flip because it's usually followed by Ian's hand on his neck and dick in his ass. 

Not this time, though. This time it's just a smile. 

"Stop it," Mickey says, barely keeping a smile off his face. He picks up the gun and starts shooting again.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks, y'all. I wrote this very quickly and without a beta, so I apologize for it being awful and/or full of mistakes. 
> 
> Yell at me on tumblr:  
> withhishands.tumblr.com


End file.
